Title: "Perfection Is..." (College AU - Part One) Pairing: Karl Urban/Orlando Bloom Rating: PG-13 Summary: Everything about Karl was perfect. Disclaimer: Never happened. Notes: Written for the Comment_Fic Songs & Lyrics post - my prompts were 'anything you can do, I can do better' and Karl/Orlando. The problem with having a best friend like Karl was that he was really unhealthy for Orlando's ego. Self-esteem. Whatever you want to call it. Fucking dude was, like, perfect and shit. Captain of the football team and the baseball team and was on the relay team for track. Karl could run a mile in 15 flat, throw a wicked curve ball (and led their team in batting average) and an even more wicked spiral (not to mention that he led the team in rushing yards). Perfect 4.0 GPA across the board, including Applied Physics (which he was taking as an elective, come on, who the fuck did that???), he headed up the debate team and was so persuasive in his arguments that the last two teams they'd faced in competition had defaulted rather than face him. He was physically perfect, too, with perfect six-pack abs, well-defined arms and thighs, and a perfectly chiseled face. Hell, even his calves were perfectly formed. Karl made it to each class on time (even the 7AM Art Studies class that everyone else slept through), called his folks each week just to catch up, and, get this, right, Karl didn't even torture his younger brother, which was just downright unpatriotic, as far as Orlando was concerned. Karl didn't get plastered (oh, he drank, he wasn't a prude or anything, he just didn't get drunk - which was also unpatriotic), he never got lost, and even his ex-girlfriends acted like Karl had done them a favor by going out with them. (For real. Orlando had asked at least three of them and gotten the same response. It was sort of Stepford creepy, except kinda cute.) Even his imperfections were perfect. Like his crooked front tooth. Or his asymmetrical ears. Or his god-awful stubbornness. Or the way he always tapped his pen against a flat surface when he was thinking. Even when he used up all of the hot water in the shower (and he always used up all of the hot water in the shower – Orlando thought the dude was part fish or some shit) or ate the last of the Fritos in the bag (he always bought more) or laughed too loud in the library when they were studying (but never got kicked out), it all still added to Karl's overall fucking perfectness. It would be easy to hate the guy. But when Karl smiled at him with those slightly crooked teeth, or when he dragged Orlando into the shower with him to use up all of the hot water, or when Orlando traced those asymmetrical ears with his tongue while Karl's (incredibly perfect) fingers were wrapped around him, Orlando didn't give a flying fuck that he was second best to Karl at almost everything on the planet. They were both equal in all the ways that really mattered. Onto ...As Perfection Does Main College AU page If you enjoyed this fic, please leave feedback here. Thanks!